BEING A WALLFLOWER / DORSET

I was one of the quiet ones. 

The shy kid who's anxious to raise her hand. 

I didn't like to be on the spotlight and always stood couple of steps backwards. 

Though, I didn't feel alone. I made friends in my own little ways. 

I shared my food and told them stories.

Only when I grew up to be 16 I realised, maybe I am not shy at all.

Maybe I just like things differently. 

Maybe I just prefer to be in a quieter environment with people I genuinely know.

That even though I'm not as loud, I still have things to say. 

That I express my self in many different ways. Like in dance and writing.

I feel different. 

Why don't I like the things most people like?

Why don't I find it fun what most people find fun?

Am I the only one who doesn't start a conversation with "I am so hangover, I drank a lot last night"?

Tell me about your thoughts, your dreams and your beliefs.

Tell me what you love and what you don't. Give me facts and trivias I've never heard of.

Tell me what you're scared of, your passions, your ideas.

And I'll do the same.

I don't open up to a lot of people.

Not because I have trust issues 

But because I carefully choose whom I give a piece of my self to

I always tell myself, quality over quantity

I may just be a wallflower amidst this vast forest

But I know who I am

Someone who is not afraid to be alone

Who reads, writes and gets inspired by nature

Who most of the time prefer to spend the night watching a movie from the comfort of my bed 

But I do surprise my self a lot of times.

Being friends with people the polar opposite of me - loud and crazy

I take chances. I say yes to things entirely out of my comfort zone

And these circumstances continuously change me.

I am not as quiet as before, I tell you that.

And I learned how to express myself by saying exactly what's on my mind and not be afraid to do it.

I am learning to live in the moment

How to have fun and dance and let go, and build relationships

I am a wallflower continuously growing and learning

And I'm not stopping my self

Even if it means I have to get out my house and be out there